I'm slowly learning how vulnerable I have made myself. This is not an easy realization for me because I've tried for as long as I know to guard myself from everyone around me. Today I've come full circle and realized that I've failed at this task quite miserably. It's amazing how you think to yourself that you're "stone cold" and then one thing brings you to your knees in an instant. You start questioning everything that lead up to this point and re-thinking every move. So right now I'm thinking to myself was it all worth it? And honestly at this point I cannot answer that question. So for now I'm in a state of denial and will try to forget what has happened tonight. I will dry my tears and take a few deep breaths and force myself to take a step in the right direction. It will be a difficult step to take...but the only way for me to move forward.
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